Abide with me

I am still in the second day of complaints free world. I have found my weakness upon being sarcastic especially with some people who I don't get to talk to often to try to be funny. As a foreigner, speaking English never gets easy, especially in meetings so I start being funny by talking some complains in a fashion of sarcastic to break some ices. I have done my best not saying anything but still sometimes old me comes out without a warning, so here I come to switch my arm bend.
I notice more and more how sinful my life has been especially using negative words upon even not that important. While participating this complaints free world series, I have been convicted more than anytime before. Most of my morning prayers has been confessing my sins lately.

I have chosen the anthem for this week with a deep prayer as a plea to the Lord that we may continue living positively in only one condition- abided in Him completely. We need Jesus to abide within us completely to pursue His ways to live this world.

Even though God has been convicting me greatly, I am so grateful. Because of His grace, and mercy, my sins are forgiven. That is why I could still have my bracelet on my wrist.

I pray that we may be able to pray together in one Spirit, one heart, and one voice to lift up this song on this Sunday.

Abide with me

Abide with me; fast falls the eventide;
the darkness deepens; Lord, with me abide.
When other helpers fail and comforts flee,
Help of the helpless, O abide with me.

Swift to its close ebbs out life's little day;
earth's joys grow dim; its glories pass away;
change and decay in all around I see;
O thou who changest not, abide with me.

I need thy presence every passing hour.
What but thy grace can foil the tempter's power?
Who, like thyself, my guide and stay can be?
Through cloud and sunshine, Lord, abide with me.

I fear no foe, with thee at hand to bless;
ills have no weight, and tears not bitterness.
Where is death's sting? Where, grave, thy victory?
I triumph still, if thou abide with me.

Hold thou thy cross before my closing eyes;
shine through the gloom and point me to the skies.
Heaven's morning breaks, and earth's vain shadows flee;
in life, in death, O Lord, abide with me.

Near to the Heart of God

Even though I am still in day one with the purple bracelet, I have been fully grateful each time when I need to switch it to my other wrist. God has started telling me about His unhappiness upon my behaviors and attitudes a way before the bracelet was given. God told me whether I liked it or not, that I need to stop them and confess my sins for sake of me. I have done one by one for time to time but found out that I still repeat the same thing and there was not “transformation” yet. So, when I got this bracelet, I prayed for God’s great mercy upon me to really change my words, actions, and attitudes. Day one, I did four times changing the bracelet over just anything big but my habitable words and complaints. I have noticed how sinful I was in a daily base. Day two, I did switched twice while I was driving route 50 and blamed the construction and slow pork drivers were reasons that I complained. At that night, God revealed to me that the blaming part was to be confessed, so I did but sadly. On third day, I was discouraged by recognizing how sinful I was so I had a long face in front of God at my prayer time. And God showed me a purple robe of Jesus while I was confessing my long lists of sins. God reminded me that the bracelet is not about controlling my behaviors or habits, but a reminder of God’s grace that Jesus were wearing for us until the cross. I cried for a while because of God’s love and grace upon us. He is not trying to catch me and convict in every single sins to judge but rather He wants me to remember His grace and mercy pour out through Jesus upon me to set me free. What a relief and comfort! So, on third day, I was encouraged to wear it as a symbol of God’s grace. In Hebrew 4:14-16, Paul shares, “Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has ascended into heaven, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith we profess.  For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet he did not sin. Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.” 

God knows who we are more than we know who we are. What I need to do is confessing that I can’t go on to even day 2 without His help, and I am forgiven by His grace and mercy each day. He wants us to live with real freedom which is given by Jesus’s redemption when we confess that we are all sinners without His grace and mercy.

I would like to share the lyric of an anthem for 11:00 o’clock this week because it is a prayer for the same matter. I pray that we all have a chance to experience God’s grace and mercy through this challenge and it brings us to go nearer to the heart of God.

Near to the Heart of God

Draw me nearer, nearer, blessed Lord, to the cross where Thou hast died; draw me nearer, nearer, nearer blessed Lord, to Thy precious bleeding side.

There is a place of comfort sweet near to the heart of God, a place where we our Savior meet, near to the heart of God. O Jesus, blest Redeemer, sent from the heart of God, holds us who wait before Thee near to the heart of God.

There is a place of full release near to the heart of God, a place where all is joy and peace, near to the heart of God. O Jesus, blest Redeemer, sent from the heart of God, hold us who wait before Thee near to the heart of God.